A wedding is a memorable and important day for any bride and groom, so being chosen to offer words of congratulations at the wedding ceremony is an honor, though it can be nerve-wracking for many. Some people may find it hard to say really meaningful things at a wedding, or they may even get nervous and not know what to say at all.

Some people are natural speakers, and are able to create and express themselves without any trouble.  Others get tongue-tied at the mere thought of having to say something in a public environment. Try to stay on point, and refrain from any inside jokes, since the rest of the reception guests may have no idea what you’re talking about. In addition, you don’t want to put the bride are groom into a sensitive or embarrassing situation where questions will be asked or curiosity will run rampant for the remainder of the reception. Taking passages out of songs, books or other popular quotes may help you define what you’re trying to say.

There are many websites out there that help speakers write words of congratulations for a multitude of weddings. These software tools help create personalized letters, speeches or other words of congratulations that allow the speaker to fill in the blanks for a well-thought out speech. In the event that a guest was invited but unable to attend, sending words of congratulations for a wedding are also traditionally accepted. Remember that a simple note or letter of congratulations is appreciated and viewed as thoughtful, even if you’re unable to attend the wedding.

Some common things to talk about in a wedding congratulations speech are speaking on the love the bride and groom have for each other, future hopes for the couple, as well as any personal thoughts on the relationship of the two people joined in marriage. Words of congratulations are almost always recorded on the wedding video so it is important to remember to do your best to sound intelligent and thoughtful.

Many guest speakers at wedding receptions often open their comments with the famous phrase or verse that ties into the wedding theme, personality of the bride and groom, or that reference the season. Some wedding congratulations are humorous, while others are somber and traditional. While you do want to take a few moments to convey your heartfelt wishes for the married couple, try to avoid long-winded speeches that start from the moment you met the bride or groom in kindergarten and follow their lives to the present moment.

If desired, make a note card with highlights of points which you would like to mention during a congratulatory speech, try to keep it under three minutes, and try to offer a feeling of spontaneity and sincerity. Remember that words of congratulations are just that, and are not being presented to heads of state (well, not most of the time), but for your friends, family members, and loved ones.

Many wedding guests look forward to their opportunity to congratulate the bride and groom on their special day. In many cases, these sayings and expressions of good will and good wishes are offered during the wedding reception dinner. Traditionally, such sayings and well wishes are meant to be solemn, heartfelt, and serious.

However, times have changed, and the wedding congratulations sayings in the 21st century can be humorous, whimsical, slightly sarcastic, or downright funny. Through the ages, words of congratulations for wedding couples have been quoted by such literary greats as Robert Frost to those offered by political and religious figures, as well as comedians. Take a look at some of the famous words of congratulations sayings that have been expressed by famous people.

To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up. -  Ogden Nash

There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage. - Martin Luther

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. - Rita Rudner

Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner. - Amy Bloom

Of course, as there are books filled with such words of wedding congratulations and sayings and quotes, but this doesn’t mean the guest speakers at wedding parties and receptions need to rely on such. Originality is always appreciated when it comes to offering congratulations and well wishes. In many situations, words of congratulations from friends and family members are often personal, amusing, and at times even embarrassing.

However, whether such wedding congratulations are cheesy, serious, or downright amusing, well wishes for wedded couples are generally offered from the heart and convey a sense of hope, love, strength, and unity for the newly married couple. So, the next time you’re asked to offer your words of congratulations at a wedding, remember that your words and your wishes should come from the heart, and express your joy for the future happiness of the wedded couple.

When deciding on who to pay for what, not only does it get confusing but it can also be a sticky situation.  Talking about money is always a sensitive topic.  These days, the bride and groom usually splits the costs of the wedding.  However, in a traditional American wedding, the bride’s family usually pays for most of the costs.

Traditionally, these are how the costs are split.  If you want to download the form instead, click on this link here:  

Who Pays for What Worksheet

Out of the Bride’s wallet:

• Groom’s wedding ring
• Wedding gift for the groom
• Gifts for the guests (wedding favors)
• Accommodation for out-of-town guests
• Wedding day lingerie
• Bridesmaids luncheon 

Out of the Groom’s wallet:

• Bride’s rings (including the engagement ring)
• Wedding gift for the bride
• Honeymoon vacation
• Marriage license
• Groomsmen gifts
• Bride’s bouquet
• Corsages for mother of bride and mother of groom
• Boutonnieres for men in wedding party
• Ties and accessories for the men in the wedding party
• Clergy, Justice of the Peace, Wedding Officiant or minister’s fee 

On the Bride’s family:

• Wedding planner
• Engagement party and announcement
• Wedding reception
• Bride’s attire
• Wedding invitations, announcements, thank you notes
• Wedding photographer and videographer
• Wedding ceremony costs
• Bridesmaids and flower girl’s flowers and accessories
• Ring bearer’s accessories
• Transportation for bridal party from ceremony to reception
• All gratuities
• Their own attire

On the Groom’s family:

• Their own attire
• The rehearsal dinner 

The Maid of Honor pays for:

• Wedding shower
• Bachelorette party

The Best Man pays for:

• Bachelor party

The Attendants pay for:

• Wedding attire
• Wedding gifts to the newlyweds

Do keep in mind that this is just what is traditionally paid for by each party.  These days, everyone and anyone can pay for anything.

Guest books can be a nice addition to your wedding ceremony.  They’re pretty, they’re traditional, and are a lovely keepsake.  Not only that, but they give you an opportunity to involve a friend or family member in the ceremony by entrusting them with the responsibility of facilitating the guest book signing.

However, some people want to have something a little bit more unique to commemorate the people who came to share in their day.  If you are in that situation, there are several unique ideas you can use that will help to make the day your own.

One idea is to create a wedding wishes scrapbook.  When guests initially enter the venue, they have a Polaroid photo taken of them.  This will be placed on one page of the scrapbook.  The guests will also, at a point in the day that makes sense, be given a paper or card to write a meaningful note to the happy couple.  Depending on the size of the paper or card and the size of the scrapbook page, this will either be placed lower on the same page as the picture, or, if that won’t fit, on the facing page.

Another idea is to have a beautiful photograph of the two of you with matting that is four or five inches wide for guests to sign.  This is particularly nice because it gives the couple a keepsake that they can actually display by hanging on the wall of their home after the wedding.

If you are a young, modern couple, you can have a guest book with a technical twist!  You can have an audio or video guest book where people can leave you their messages.  This can be in addition to or instead of a traditional guest book or one of the other alternate ideas.  The great thing about this idea is that people often feel more comfortable expressing themselves verbally than in writing, so you are apt to get some very lovely and sincere messages that you would never have gotten had you limited the guests to writing.

A particularly cozy idea is to have your guests sign fabric panels with fabric paint pens, which will later be assembled into a quilt that you can use for display purposes – or to snuggle under with your honey!  If you do plan to use it and subsequently wash it, however, you will need to make sure that you use paint pens with washable, permanent ink, otherwise the quilt will lose the messages when you wash it, and that would be heartbreaking.

You can also have a pre-fired ceramic plate or bowl that guests sign with special ceramic paint pens.  These can both be ordered online.  After the ceremony, you can have the piece fired to make the comments permanent.  Again, this provides you with a display-ready keepsake that will last forever.

As with any part of your ceremony, it really comes down to what fits the personality of the bride and groom.  You need to keep looking for original ideas, discussing, and don’t settle on one until you find one that excites and feels right to both of you!

Throwing rice at weddings is one of the most iconic parts of the ceremony – the ideas of weddings and throwing rice are almost inextricably intertwined.  However, if you are looking for something different, there are lots of alternatives. Although, I will note, that the urban legend about rice exploding in bird’s stomachs is just that – an urban legend.  So hopefully, if throwing rice is what you wanted, you won’t abandon the idea based on that.  However, you might not want to be continually explaining the lack of danger to guests throughout the reception, so you still may want to choose an alternative.

THROWING FLOWER PETALS – Many people throw rose petals, which is gorgeous, but if roses don’t fit in with the theme or budget of your ceremony, the petals of any kind of flower would work well.  Speak with a florist to determine which flowers fit within your budget and would work well for this purpose.

RELEASING BUTTERFLIES – This is a gorgeous and colorful alternative to rice throwing.  Each guest is given a small box or envelope that contains a live butterfly.  As the couple walks through, the guests open their boxes and a colorful swarm of live butterflies take flight.   It’s certainly a great photo op!

BLOWING BUBBLES – Another visually appealing alternative to throwing rice is blowing bubbles.  Each guest is given a small bottle with bubble liquid inside and the circular plastic ring embedded in the cap.  Not only is it aesthetically pleasing while all the guests are blowing the bubbles, but it also leaves each guest with a keepsake to take home from your wedding.

SPARKLERS – If your wedding is at night and if zoning permits, you can have each guest holding a lit sparkler.  This is a very powerful visual statement.

CONFETTI – This is a colorful option.  The great thing about confetti is that if it is not available for purchase in the color that you want, you can always make it yourself from colored paper with fun shaped confetti punchers which are available at craft stores.

RINGING BELLS – Although it will clearly bring some “It’s a Wonderful Life” inspired comments of “Every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings,” this is a great rice-throwing alternative, particularly if you have a bell-themed wedding.  It also works well for venues that don’t allow throwing of any objects on the grounds.

STREAMERS – This is similar to the confetti option, but it creates an entirely different visual look.  The long, curling streams of colored paper create a strong visual that would look fantastic in photos.

BALLOONS – Releasing balloons is yet another visually powerful statement.  A fun twist on this idea is to have your guests write good wishes for you on their balloons before releasing them.

DOVES – The downside to releasing a pair of doves as the couple exits is that each guest does not get to participate, but it is a beautiful and symbolic gesture.

These are some great alternatives to rice-throwing, but keep in mind – anything that can be thrown, basically, can be used.  So the only limit is your imagination!

Your wedding day is one of the most significant in your life, one that you want to share with all the people who are precious to you.  If some of those who are closest to your heart have passed away, that can be a difficult situation that makes the day bittersweet.  However, there are some very beautiful and meaningful ways that you can include and honor your loved ones in your ceremony.

One lovely ceremony you can incorporate is the memory candle.  This is a small candle which is lit and burns throughout the ceremony as a way to symbolize the light of that person’s soul being present throughout the ceremony.  The candle can be lit as part of the overall ceremony to draw the attention of the congregation to it, or it can be lit in a private moment prior to the ceremony so that only the couple are aware of the significance.

Another thing you can do to commemorate a loved one is to include a small dedication in the program that highlights the person you want to include.  This can be as poignant or as upbeat as you wish it to be – you can even include a short poem or passage that was meaningful to that person or in your relationship with that person.

If one of the deceased is a parent of the bride or groom, it can seem like a particularly glaring omission to leave them out of the program when putting the names of the other parents there, but you don’t need to.  Etiquette dictates that you can include the names of the deceased with the precursor, “the late…”

The presentation of roses to VIPs is a common ceremony that is included in many weddings.  At the end of this ceremony, a rose can be laid at the foot of photos of the deceased that have been placed in a prominent location.

Additionally, many couples incorporate a photo slide montage in their ceremony with pictures from when they were young and pictures of the two of them together.  A section of the montage can be included that honors those who have passed away.  The great thing about this idea is that captions can be included with your photos that detail the significance of this part of the presentation.

One thing that can be done which is more private but keeps your loved one close to your heart during the ceremony is to incorporate a piece of that person’s clothing or jewelry into what you wear that day – a necklace, earrings, cuff links  – this is limited only by your imagination and the significant objects in your relationship with that person.

Another tasteful solution is to include a flower arrangement dedicated to the person or people you are honoring.  The words “in remembrance of” can be incorporated into the design, along with small photos.

Whatever you decide in terms of honoring those you love who have passed, it will be a special addition to your wedding ceremony, because it will be something that feels one hundred percent right to you.