An important cultural event for the Vietnamese people, the wedding ceremony is also important for both the bride and groom’s families. There are many rituals involved in the chosen wedding day, which, contrary to American culture, is picked in advance by the families of the bride and groom.

The Le an hoi, or betrothal ceremony, occurs before the wedding, when the groom and his family visit the bride and her family with gifts. These gifts include nuts, cake, tea, fruits or other delicacies wrapped in a red cloth that is delivered by unmarried boys or girls. At this ceremony, the parents of the betrothed choose a date for the wedding.

On the wedding day, the groom and his family take gifts wrapped in red papers to the bride’s home. This ritual is similar to the betrothal ceremony, except that on this occasion, married people bring the gifts to the home. Men and women dress in the traditional suits or Ao Dai, and the wedding party is led by the most wealthy and successful members in the group. This act displays wishes for the new couple that they may have a blessed life together.

The groom’s family also goes to the bride’s house and offers the bride’s parents to sips of wine with tiny cups. This toast signifies that the bride’s family accepts the groom’s family into the home, and fireworks are set off to greet the family of the groom. Once the groom’s family is at the bride’s house, they formally introduce themselves and ask permission for their son to be married with the bride. A member of the bride’s family, acting as Master of Ceremony, instructs the parents of the bride to then present their daughter. The wedding dress of the bride is traditional Ao Dai, most often in the color red.

The Le cuoi, or wedding ceremony, is a party to celebrate the couple’s new life together with friends and family. Prayers are said before the wedding by the bride and groom, asking their ancestors for permission to marry. During the ceremony, they also focus on the parents, thanking them for raising and protecting them during their life. The Master of Ceremony advises the new couple about marriage and about life, and then the parents share their experiences and give a blessing to the new couple. After the blessing, the wedding rings are exchanged, and the parents also bestow gifts of gold bracelets, rings or necklaces to the newlyweds.

While this is a traditional Vietnamese wedding ceremony, there are many who elect to have a wedding in a temple or church just as in many Western cultures. Vows and rings are exchanged, although they also incorporate a traditional ceremony at the bride’s home before going to the official wedding ceremony at a church or temple.

When it comes to deciding on wedding ceremony poems or vows, one of the main considerations should always be choosing something that you’re not going to be embarrassed about five or ten years into the future. Many couples naturally grow quite enthusiastic and sentimental when it comes to creating and designing a wedding ceremony, but should always remember to keep things fresh, unique, and grounded.

When it comes to wedding ceremony poems, young couples may always rely on old standbys, such as sonnets from Shakespeare, or poems or short versus from such perennial favorites as Keats, Browning, and even Carl Sandburg. Poems, whether written by members of the wedding party, the bride, groom, or even parents, can be original as well as funny, serious, or sentimental. There are no rules when it comes to vows or poems, other than of course, that they be kept tasteful and in line with the occasion.

Many couples these days are choosing to add a little bit of humor to their ceremonies, which may have been frowned upon a few generations ago, but which is perfectly acceptable for the 21st century. The basics to choosing any type of poems or vows these days are that they should express the feelings, hopes, and dreams of the couple involved.

A few tips and guidelines regarding wedding poems:

Try not to sound too cheesy
Do attempt to create poems that are dignified
Remember that the last word of every verse does not have to rhyme with the verse before it!
Keep poems relatively short, preferably those that can be read in under a minute

In addition, it may help to remember that if poems are to be read by children, the language needs to be simple and easy to read. It also helps to remember that the attention span of wedding guests can be rather limited at times, and may depend upon the season as well as the temperature and whether or not the wedding is taking place indoors or outdoors will have a great deal of impact on how patient or attentive your wedding guests will be.

Basically, create the type of wedding ceremony that best fits the personality of both bride and groom, have fun, and most of all, remember that it’s your ceremony, so do what you’d like to do and don’t worry so much about tradition or expectations on your special day.

Many of us have attended dozens of weddings, but when it comes to planning our own, we haven’t got a clue how to schedule it. How exactly is a wedding ceremony created? How to get everyone seated, parties organized, and the bride and groom to the altar on time? That’s where wedding ceremony outlines come in.

When it comes to designing an outline or a schedule for your wedding ceremony, remember that nothing is set in stone. While there are general guidelines, there are no absolute rules that must be followed. Every couple is different. Incorporating your personality, beliefs and cultural background into the ceremony structure is just as important when designing a schedule or outline as the effort taken for reception or honeymoon planning.

A general and very basic outline is provided below. When designing your own wedding ceremony, use the key point guidelines provided and tweak it to your own needs and desires. For example, wedding ceremony outlines and schedules will often be determined by location, season, and time of day of the wedding ceremony. Be willing to experiment and ask “what if” when designing your own wedding ceremony.

The basics of a wedding ceremony outline may include but are not limited to:

Seating the guests
The processional
The wedding march
Initial remarks – prayers, stories, ‘I remember when…’
Giving away the bride
Scriptural readings or singing of songs or hymns
Exchange of wedding vows
Pronouncement
Prayers or songs

Again, this is just a basic guideline and should be adjusted to your own desires. Allow a specific amount of time for each major portion of the ceremony. When it comes to the processional aspects of the ceremony, adequate time needs to be set aside to seat the attendees and then allow time for the grooms, bridesmaids, best man and maid of honor to take their places. Just prior to the wedding march, the bride and her father or stand in will arrive.

When necessary, alter the above basics to suit your situation, location, and theme of your wedding. After all, this is your special day. Adjust it to your personality and make it a day that you will always remember.

Those who have never planned a wedding ceremony may think it’s easy, but nothing can be further from the truth. Because there are many different types of personalities, religions, and family traditions involved, planning a wedding ceremony can be a very stressful and intensive endeavor. Every wedding couple is different and each couple will have ideas about what they want in their wedding ceremony.

Most wedding ceremonies are takeoffs from what is generally considered a “traditional” service, which includes but is not limited to:

Statement of purpose (wedding a couple)
An opening prayer or statement
Charge to the couple
Declaration of consent
Presentation of the bride
Exchanging vows
Exchanging rings
Wedding pronouncement
Wedding prayers and blessings
Presentation of married couple to congregation

In most cases, nearly every other type of wedding ceremony in English speaking countries follows this type of format. Couples often opt to rearrange or alter these basics to include romantic readings such as poems or lyrics of favorite songs of the bride and groom to spiritual readings included within the body of the traditional service. Music is often a large part of the wedding ceremony and can include traditional bridal march music or favorite pieces of music of the bride and groom to match with the theme and style of the wedding.

Today, the traditional exchange of vows by the couple are producing more wedding ceremonies in which the couple has a major say in the vows that will be exchanged, and stray away from the more traditional “obedience” vows of the past. Wedding vows and statements are often discussed at length by the bride and groom and can be long or short, solemn, serious or amusing, depending upon wishes, personalities, and beliefs of the couple.

The type of ceremony is also determined by the needs, desires, and background and beliefs of the couple involved. Here are just a few types of wedding ceremonies practiced in the English-speaking world:

Anglican ceremony –traditional ceremony format
Civil ceremony -a small, non-religious ceremony often presided over by a judge
Commitment ceremonies - these are often used in place of a wedding and are also called union ceremonies
Religious ceremonies - these may include those belonging to different ethnic groups, and beliefs
Renewal of vows - renewing wedding vows

In the early years of the 21st century, more couples are opting for casual weddings than ever before, not only in the manner of dress, but in structure. Civil ceremonies are becoming increasingly popular, and even those who opt for religious and traditional ceremonies are including modern and up-to-date aspects such as decoration, dress, and creation of their own statements and vows.

The best way to determine which type of wedding ceremony might be best for you is to take a look at the different types of wedding ceremonies, or sample wedding ceremonies of family members, friends, or acquaintances to determine your own needs and desires. Every wedding ceremony can be customized and individualized to meet the needs of the bride and groom, so the sky’s the limit.

A church is one of the most popular places to have a wedding, but sometimes they are also the hardest to decorate. If the church that is being used is already decorated to the bride and grooms liking, they can save money on the budget that may be used toward something else, but in the event that it is not decorated to their liking or does not fit the style or theme of their wedding, changes should be made.

A very important item to check before booking the church is whether or not they allow decorations. Not all churches do, so finding that out well before the wedding is vital to enjoying a memorable day. If the wedding is scheduled around a holiday, the church may already have decorations to coincide with it, so be sure to ask about décor during the time frame of the wedding. Researching the venue before decorating also helps planners decide where to place flower arrangements or just to get an overview of how things will fit during the ceremony.

Some of the most common decorations for a church wedding are flowers and candles. Flowers can be bought individually to save money, and then arranged before the wedding and put around the church. Flowers are also diverse, so they match with virtually any color scheme or theme of wedding ceremony. Candles are also cost efficient, and add an elegant and romantic ambiance to the church during a ceremony.

Bows or ribbon can be added to the pews, which also look graceful, with flowers added throughout if desired. If bows are not the style a bride or groom is looking for, adding small flower arrangements look just as nice.

Church weddings are elegant and traditional, but may be hard to decorate in some instances. Be sure to ask those in charge about important information such as standard church décor during the wedding time frame, as well as what is allowed for outside parties to bring in for decoration.

The style and size of the church also has a lot to do with what type of decorations should be used. In some cases, small floral arrangements may be dwarfed or overwhelmed by the sheer size of a church, so always take that into consideration when planning as well. Don’t be afraid to go beyond flowers and bows to decorate the church. Stay tasteful and respectful of the premises, but bring some personality into play whenever possible.

It used to be that anything but a traditional service with the “Do you take this woman?” vow sequence officiated by anything but a minister and happening anyplace but a church was a radical proposition.  The one option open was the stereotypical “civil ceremony” down at city hall.  Romantic, right?  This made it very tough for people who were not religious to be satisfied with their wedding day.  Just because you’re not a church-goer, doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t want a little pomp and circumstance, right?

Well, luckily, those days are well over.  Nowadays, weddings can and do look like whatever the bride and groom envision and create them to be.  The sky is the limit.  However, sometimes it’s hard to step outside of the “traditional” wedding mind frame if that’s what you’ve been raised with.  So, if you are looking for a non-traditional or non-religious ceremony but are stumped for ideas, here are a few to get you started.

Location – The first thing to consider is the location.  If you’re going for a non-religious service, you clearly don’t want a church.  Weddings can be anywhere – parks, your home, the beach, a hotel, a restaurant.  Sometimes cool architectural spaces like museums will rent out the space.  If you have a space in mind and don’t know if they do weddings, ask them!  Even if they normally don’t, they might be thrilled to help you out, if only for the public relations benefits.

Vows – If you are merely trying to steer clear of religious connotations and not traditionalism, it could be enough for you to edit the traditional vows to omit any reference to religion.  However, if you are looking to go in a whole new direction, you might want to write your own vows.  This can be so beautiful and meaningful.

Ceremonies – Rather than something religious like being served communion, you can replace it with ceremonies like the Unity Candle or Sand Ceremony.  Also, instead of a benediction at the end of the ceremony as a whole, you can have the officiant lead a community pledge to support the couple and the marriage.

Officiant – There are many options for officiants aside from calling around to churches and looking for a minister.  One good place to start is to ask your wedding planner, if you have one, for a list of vendors, and if he or she knows of non-religious officiants specifically.  Also, don’t forget to ask your venue and your other vendors – the wedding industry is a “small town” at heart, and these folks all know each other.  Chances are they could steer you in the right direction.  Lastly, basically anyone can become ordained online.  If you have someone in mind that you would like to perform the ceremony but they are not licensed, this is something to look into.

These are a few ideas to create a ceremony that has no religious connotation.  After all, the wedding ceremony should reflect you as a couple, so if you’re not religious, why should the ceremony be?  It should be all about you and your fiance.  Remember, as far as ideas go – the sky’s the limit!

Your wedding day is one of the most significant in your life, one that you want to share with all the people who are precious to you.  If some of those who are closest to your heart have passed away, that can be a difficult situation that makes the day bittersweet.  However, there are some very beautiful and meaningful ways that you can include and honor your loved ones in your ceremony.

One lovely ceremony you can incorporate is the memory candle.  This is a small candle which is lit and burns throughout the ceremony as a way to symbolize the light of that person’s soul being present throughout the ceremony.  The candle can be lit as part of the overall ceremony to draw the attention of the congregation to it, or it can be lit in a private moment prior to the ceremony so that only the couple are aware of the significance.

Another thing you can do to commemorate a loved one is to include a small dedication in the program that highlights the person you want to include.  This can be as poignant or as upbeat as you wish it to be – you can even include a short poem or passage that was meaningful to that person or in your relationship with that person.

If one of the deceased is a parent of the bride or groom, it can seem like a particularly glaring omission to leave them out of the program when putting the names of the other parents there, but you don’t need to.  Etiquette dictates that you can include the names of the deceased with the precursor, “the late…”

The presentation of roses to VIPs is a common ceremony that is included in many weddings.  At the end of this ceremony, a rose can be laid at the foot of photos of the deceased that have been placed in a prominent location.

Additionally, many couples incorporate a photo slide montage in their ceremony with pictures from when they were young and pictures of the two of them together.  A section of the montage can be included that honors those who have passed away.  The great thing about this idea is that captions can be included with your photos that detail the significance of this part of the presentation.

One thing that can be done which is more private but keeps your loved one close to your heart during the ceremony is to incorporate a piece of that person’s clothing or jewelry into what you wear that day – a necklace, earrings, cuff links  – this is limited only by your imagination and the significant objects in your relationship with that person.

Another tasteful solution is to include a flower arrangement dedicated to the person or people you are honoring.  The words “in remembrance of” can be incorporated into the design, along with small photos.

Whatever you decide in terms of honoring those you love who have passed, it will be a special addition to your wedding ceremony, because it will be something that feels one hundred percent right to you.